You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize