Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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