How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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