Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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