I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
