Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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