She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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