The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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