Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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