cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
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