i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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