She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
