Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
