Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
