i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
