just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
