whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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