he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
