if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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