How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
