Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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