His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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