After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Two words: blizzard sex
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
the raccoons are back...
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