I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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