singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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