had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i think i have herpe
just one?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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