Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
