dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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