ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
