I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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