What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
