i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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