He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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