just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
