Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
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