This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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