She's JV to your varsity
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
