There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
