i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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