Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
