Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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