He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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