you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
