...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
