...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
