if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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