Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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