you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
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