do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
