I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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